John is not a “good” student. He always sleeps in the class. Today he sleeps again.
“John!” Teacher says angrily.
“What? What’s wrong?” John is awaken.
“Why do you make a face? It’s classroom. Look! Everyone is laughing.” Teacher says.
“No one is laughing.” Teacher says.
“No, it’s not me. I was not making a face. I was sleeping.” John fells upset.
“Um. Not bad. You can admit your fault. You are still a good boy.” Teacher is satisfied with it.
英语幽默小故事：女士优先Lady First
A teacher asked her class: "Is the sentence " The ox and the cow are in the fields" correct?" Most of the children said: "Yes, it is all right!" And only one little boy said: "No, it is not correct. The lady must be mentioned first."
One day, Mr. Lion holds a party. Many animals come and drink a lot of wine. At last there is a pot of wine. Who can drink it? They drink out an idea and decide to have a match-Draw a snake. If you finish first, you can get it. Soon Mr.Wolf finishes drawing. “Yeah, I’ve finished. I’m No.1,” he says. But he draws again and says, “Oh, let me add feet and my snake.” At the time, Mr. Gorilla also finishes. He takes away the pot of wine and drinks, then he says, “That isn’t a snake. Snakes have no feet. I get the wine.”
Tom is a very old man. After dinner, he likes walking in the street. And he goes to bed at seven o’clock. But tonight, a car stopped at his house. A policeman helps him get out. He tells Tom’s wife, “The old man couldn’t find his way in the street. He asked me to take him in the car.” After the policeman leaves there, his wife asks, “Tom, you go to the street every night. But tonight you can’t find the way, what’s the matter?” The old man smiles like a child and says, “I couldn’t find my way? I didn’t want to walk home.”
Mother asks her son, “Jim, if you have ten candies, and you eat four, then how many candles do you have?” “Ten.” Jim says. “Then,” Mother asks. “Yes, Mum. Four candles are in my stomach and six candies are out of my stomach. Four and six is ten, isn’t it right?” 十块糖 妈妈问儿子：“吉姆， 如果你有10块糖，吃了4块，那你还有几块糖？” “10块。”吉姆说。 “10块？”妈妈问。 “是的，妈妈。因为4块在我的肚子里面，6块在肚子外面，4加6等于10，不对吗？”
英语幽默小故事：明天早上数 Count Tomorrow Morning
It’s a right. John is looking at the sky. Tom is John’s younger brother. He asks John “What are you doing?” John says, “I’m counting stars.” Tom laughs and says, “It’s really dark now. Why not count them tomorrow morning?” 明天早上数 这是一个晚上。约翰抬头看着天空。 汤姆是约翰的弟弟。他问约翰：“你在干什么？” 约翰说：“我在数星星。” 汤姆笑着说：“现在天空太黑了。你为什么不等到明天早上再数呢？”